My Day Off and Other Anti-Accomplishments


Welp, yesterday I didn’t post a damn thing, and do you know why that is? No, neither do I. Actually, I do, and here’s the story of what really happened.

Telea, awesome, explosions, fighting, guns, fast and the furious-like racing scene, riding an elephant, tiny hippos, more explosions, met a hot guy, romantic montage with said guy set to ‘Baby Got Back’, really large explosions, real life ass muffins, Drugs, airplanes, coconuts, rum, and explosions in the bedroom (wink-wink).

So, to sum it all up, all I told the truth about in that last statement was Telea, awesome and drugs. I apologize for leading you astray, and now here’s the real synopsis of what went down on Wednesday.

I took three sleeping pills instead of one and I slept from 3 in the morning on Wednesday all the way to 1 am on Thursday, when I begrudgingly booted up the old internet and did nothing but scroll through my Tumblr feed all the way up to the moment that I decided to stop being lazy and actually post a blog.

And so goes the life of one Telea Dodge, who obviously lacks a life, friends, a job, and any sort of respect for normal sleeping hours. Goddamn her, we can’t decide if she is foolish or brilliant, so we will settle on Fooliant and Brillish. Yes, yes, those are actual words. No, no, don’t look them up.

I would like to state, in my defense, that this was long-awaited sleep and that well, fuck you for assuming I’m going to post a blog every day. That has only been my tried and true standard for the past couple of weeks (Though you’re proud of me, aren’t you?). I’m afraid that I have slipped even deeper into the chasm of doom that is the internet.

I may not make it out of this alive, but if it’s wrong, I don’t want to be right [and other crap cliches that are actually about love].

On the bright side (as if sleeping for 22 hours wasn’t enough of a bright side for my fellow Satanists) I may get to go on an adventure today and possibly receive snuggles or kisses on this adventure. Even without the snuggles and kisses, it will be good to leave the general area of my pantry-that-was-converted-into-a-room-over-a-decade-ago and actually use my legs for the first time since ‘Nam.

So, there’s my sorry excuse for a blog, and my question of the day (since I apparently do that now) is…

What do you do on your day off?

Love ya!

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About mylifeinheartbeats

Telea is an aspiring Musician who spends too much time aspiring to be a Writer who thinks she's a Comedian. There's not much more to know, except for everything. Telea has a tendency to not think before she speaks or acts. She enjoys chocolate, long walks on the beach, and talking about herself in the third person. She wants to get to know you, so please send her your Name, Address, and SSN. Telea promises that, though she has indeed committed one count of Lewd and Lascivious behavior (to be tried under a court of law), she is a good person and will not intentionally harm you/expose herself to you/hate you for your stupid perspectives/axe-murder you. Telea believes in the greater good, Nutella, peace, free love for all, and snuggles. She chooses Bacon over you, unless you come bearing bacon. She is a fat woman trapped inside a curvy woman's body. She is not for sale unless the price tag you put on her has something to do with world peace. She will sell herself for world peace. She hopes in the deepest of her heart places that you will enjoy her blog and find reason to follow it. Telea thanks you.

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