I am awake, I am alive, I am watching Dinotopia. My butthole is very sick, and my stomach seems to be going with it. I feel awful. It’s a very interesting experience that I would not care to repeat any time soon.
I trust you to not tell people, dear internet, that my ass burns like I just injected Ghost Pepper juice into with a very large, very sharp needle. Of course, having shared this with the entire world, I can only hope that no one I know is reading this.
Winky face. Troll face. Double troll face. Triple troll hating on weird ‘notecard’ Youtubers face. If you know what I’m talking about, you might be stifling a giggle-snort right now.
Moving on. Today, I barely ate anything. I was so hungry, but every time I saw food, my stomach attacked me like a rabid bullfrog.
I did consume a whole jar of pickles, and drank about a gallon of water. I don’t quite feel as beautiful as most Telea’s my age generally do.
I have to wake up early tomorrow. Bright and early. For a job. Because I love delivering the monthly newspaper. I really need the money, but I’m feeling as if…if I move…bad things are going to happen, and they are going to happen hard.
We shall see, Watson. We shall see.
I’m going to go…do something…involving a bathroom, some crying, and a lot of toilet paper. Please forgive me, and remember that girls don’t poop.
Love ya!
No girls never poop. Especially my wife.
A bullfrog is the strangest name for an animal. It’s like naming something Kangaroo Giraffe!
Sorry I think I’ve had too much caffeine 🙂
Haha, also, girls don’t fart, they fluff.
I don’t know, I always thought that people just didn’t believe in the bullfrog all that much. Every time they saw it, they went: THAT IS BULLSHIT!
And scientists would then reply: No, it’s a frog.
Amen, girls do not poop. I have to tell you Telea, you know me… and I saw this. You’re fucked. (; Btw, I gagged the whole time I read this. hahaha. (; Feel better. x
Haha, I know. It’s gonna be a bad day, starting with not working. I might commit to living in the bathroom (call it a social experiment, not an illness) for the next 12 to 24 hours.