The Virgin Mary Didn’t Lie…Not at First, Anyway!


Arizona. The land of awesome ideas. If I was a guy, I would move there. Right the fuck away. Let me explain.

Bus, bike, or airplane down to Arizona, where dreams really do come true! In the corner we have the Republican-based Governor Jan Brewer, and in this corner, we have the rest of the state. Here in Arizona, big bucks can buy anything, including a law saying that pregnancy can begin up to two weeks before conception. What does this mean, boys and girls?

It means you better be careful with table conversation when someone is wine-and-dining you because you may already be carrying their foolish lovechild.

It means that the stork doesn’t bring babies, quite obviously.

It means that birth control, condoms, and alcohol should all be illegal, because…guess what? You could be murdering your unconcieved baby.

It means that the Virgin Mary wasn’t lying when she said she got preggers without actually doing the deed.

It means…I can sue my date for child support way earlier.

It means that I can say I won’t take responsibility for this child because she was pregnant before I banged her.

Last of all, it means…

I’M MOVING TO ARIZONA!

Yes, children, it’s true. Now, the law that was passed doesn’t actually state this, but I have some links for you to follow, and some extra information that already existed. I want you to form your own opinions on this matter, and not just believe everything I say.

http://thenewcivilrightsmovement.com/pregnancy-begins-2-weeks-before-conception-now-the-law-in-arizona/politics/2012/04/13/37993

http://www.godlikeproductions.com/forum1/message1840553/pg1

http://www.rawstory.com/rs/2012/04/13/jan-brewer-signs-abortion-ban-defining-pregnancy-before-conception/

http://rt.com/usa/news/arizona-bill-conception-abortion-387/

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2012/04/13/arizona-abortion-law-2012-pregnancy-fetus-ultrasound-late-term-abortion-20-weeks-jan-brewer_n_1422853.html

I believe that’s enough linkage for you. Just so you know, Planned Parenthood (plannedparenthood.org) states that…

“In order for a woman to become pregnant, she must release an egg from her ovary — ovulation. Next, the egg and sperm must meet and form a single cell — fertilization. Then pregnancy begins when and if the fertilized egg attaches to a woman’s uterus and begins to grow — implantation.”

How I love laws passed on medical impossibilities.

We had a request!!!

” I remember that Bernard Shaw quote I read when I first stumbled on your blog. Apples & ideas & all that guff. Write 5 of your favourite quotes & why you like ‘em? – Bpshielsy (www.thebipolarplace1.wordpress.com)

My five favorite quotes and why I love them!

1. “Without life, there is no music. Without Music…there is no life.”I don’t know who wrote this and am too lazy to look it up. I love this quote because it directly applies to everything I believe. I couldn’t live without music. Living without music, like the quote implies, is impossible. You guys know that I aspire to just sing my whole life through. This will be my Senior quote when I graduate and also some of the only text in my belief system.

2. “The wonderful thing about Tiggers
Is Tiggers are wonderful things
Their tops are made out of rubber
Their bottoms are made out of springs
They’re bouncy, trouncy, flouncy, pouncy
Fun, fun, fun, fun, FUN!
But the most wonderful thing about Tiggers
Is I’m the only one

The wonderful thing about Tiggers
Is Tiggers are wonderful chaps
They’re loaded with vim and with vigor
They love to leap in your laps
They’re bouncy, trouncy, flouncy pouncy
Fun, fun, fun, fun, FUN
But the most wonderful thing about Tiggers
Is I’m the only one.

Tiggers are wonderful fellahs.
Tiggers are awfully sweet.
Everyone elses is jealous,
And thats why I repeat…

The wonderful thing about Tiggers
Are Tiggers are wonderful things
Their tops are made out of rubber
Their bottoms are made out of springs
They’re bouncy, trouncy, flouncy, pouncy
Fun, fun, fun, fun, FUN!
But the most wonderful thing about Tiggers
Is I’m the only one.
Yes, I’m the only one
(GRRrrrrrr…) ooOOoooOOooooOOOO!!!”

This is my long quote. It’s less of a quote and more of a song, but when someone asks me what I’m like, there’s an 80 percent chance that I will sing this song all the way through, inserting my name instead of the word Tigger. I grew up with Winnie the Pooh, and I found Tigger to be THE MOST ENDEARING CHARACTER EVER.

3. “Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better…it’s not.” Oh, the Lorax. It’s hard to pick your very favorite Dr. Seuss quote, but this is definitely the one. I love it so much. It makes sense. It’s perfect. People do need to care more.

4. “So it’s not gonna be easy. It’s gonna be really hard. We’re gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, for ever, you and me, every day. Will you do something for me, please? Just picture your life for me? 30 years from now, 40 years from now? What’s it look like? If it’s with him, go. Go! I lost you once, I think I can do it again. If I thought that’s what you really wanted. But don’t you take the easy way out.” The Notebook. One of the only movies (except for ‘Listen to Your Heart’ and ‘Transformers’) that can make me cry like a baby…every time. I don’t think I need a reason for this quote. It just makes my heart sad and happy at the same time.

5. ‘”Music’s a powerful thing. A song can change your mood. Make a memory. One song can change your whole life.” This is a quote from ‘Listen to your heart’. I love it because it’s true. Every memory that I have, I can define with music. Every song, I have a memory for.

Of course, my favorite quotes may change. Of course they will. But right now…these are the quotes that inspire and define me. Sorry for such a serious (and long) post today.

Love ya!

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About mylifeinheartbeats

Telea is an aspiring Musician who spends too much time aspiring to be a Writer who thinks she's a Comedian. There's not much more to know, except for everything. Telea has a tendency to not think before she speaks or acts. She enjoys chocolate, long walks on the beach, and talking about herself in the third person. She wants to get to know you, so please send her your Name, Address, and SSN. Telea promises that, though she has indeed committed one count of Lewd and Lascivious behavior (to be tried under a court of law), she is a good person and will not intentionally harm you/expose herself to you/hate you for your stupid perspectives/axe-murder you. Telea believes in the greater good, Nutella, peace, free love for all, and snuggles. She chooses Bacon over you, unless you come bearing bacon. She is a fat woman trapped inside a curvy woman's body. She is not for sale unless the price tag you put on her has something to do with world peace. She will sell herself for world peace. She hopes in the deepest of her heart places that you will enjoy her blog and find reason to follow it. Telea thanks you.

One response »

  1. It’s amazing in favor of me to have a web page, which is useful for my experience. thanks admin

    Reply

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