I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how I never ever have any time to think anymore. You may be going:
“Well, just spend that time thinking about not thinking to think.”
To which I spend about 3 seconds decoding that semi-cryptic sentence and then respond with a big dose of ‘you’re a total moron.’
One, two, three.
All that time that I spend thinking about not being able to think that subsequently causes me to have had time thinking is actually all of these brief little moments in my every day life that add up to a lot of time that I spend thinking about not being able to think.
It’s frustrating, and furthermore, I think about it way too much. Let’s all just stop for about five hours so I can lay down in my bed with a really confusing book about thoughts and decode all of these little passing thoughts that I have not had a chance to analyze to the fullest extent of my brain power.
Should we move on? Yes, yes, I think so. Just a warning, though, my list of five…
Will be about thinking (or lack thereof).
So, today is Friday, and this is a relief because I am really done dealing with anything related to school and it makes me frustrated. Also, after the Forensics meet tomorrow, I’ll have a few hours of think time (that I will spend watching Supernatural) and then a nice sleep before a movie day. I love having friends over and just watching movies. It’s the best. No, actually the best is…
Let’s not get into all of my dirty little thoughts (like…running naked in a thunderstorm).
Okay, so, let’s get to this list of five.
Five ways to get some free time for your thoughts (extreme version).
1. Kidnap everybody who distracts you, duct tape their mouths shut, and hide them in your basement. That way, they can’t bug you. This list may include: boss, agent, best friend, family members, school administration etc.
2. Quit everything. Just resign. This list of things you could quit from goes as: job, school, play practice, sports, friendship, and, in rare cases, life.
3. Take off. As in, take your (or someone else’s) car and hit the road. Once you are at least 500 miles away from all of your problems, you have permission to start thinking about all of your problems.
4. Lock yourself into a secure bank safe. They can’t hear you, you can’t hear them. If you bought the safe, only you and management have access to getting in, and, of course, only management has access to get you out…since you’ll be locked in a fucking safe. Hey, at least you have time for some deep reflection on what an idiotic plan that was.
5. Cut off your ears (yeah, I know that doesn’t impair hearing, but we’re pretending it does), sew your mouth shut, and rip out your eyes. You will either be of no interest to people because you can’t respond, or you will be so gruesome to people’s eyes that they just don’t want to be around you. Problem solved.
Okay, that is it for the day.