Growing up.


I’ve been thinking a lot about growing up. I mean, I’m seventeen years old. I’m almost ready to go out and take life by the horns and make myself a career. I’m almost ready to face my fears and conquer them. But really, I’m not. I have no idea what to do. I’ve been inspired a thousand times and my dreams have been crushed a thousand-fold.

So, what do I do? I don’t. But I’ve been learning so many lessons, been discovering so many things.

Lesson one: Growing up isn’t about forgetting who you were, it’s about finding who you are.

Lesson two: Growing up isn’t about mourning the things you’ve lost, it’s about celebrating the things you’ve found.

Lesson three: Growing up isn’t about just learning lessons, it’s about applying them to your every day life.

There’s so many things I’ve learned, but I have trouble actually paying attention to my own advice. I can get so wrapped up in something that I’ll break my own heart. It can be an inspiration, or a crush, or just a risk I decided to take once day that ended up making me crawl into bed at night, hurting as if someone had punched me in the heart.

I’m not saying I’m the only one like this. Of course not. We’re hormonal teenagers, we’re young, and unwise. Well, I’m told I’m wise, but I can’t believe it myself sometimes. I know a lot, and I have a lot of common sense, but again, it’s not what you have, it’s what you apply.

Admittedly, I’m just scared about everything. Why shouldn’t I be? It’s my whole life that I’m supposed to plan even before I know how to make the right decisions. In High School, they’re trying to prepare us for the world, but the truth is, we’re not. We’re not even ready to get prepared. Even those people who have everything planned from day one are terrified. We’re supposed to graduated high school and go straight to college, already having made all the difficult decisions like:

WHAT AM I GOING TO DEVOTE MY ENTIRE LIFE TO?!

I’m scared. I’m terrified. But I’m not going to let that stop be.

Lesson four: Growing up isn’t about running from your past, it’s about running to your future.

I’m ready, even if I’m not really ready at all. Are you?

“The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt.”

– Berntrand Russell

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About mylifeinheartbeats

Telea is an aspiring Musician who spends too much time aspiring to be a Writer who thinks she's a Comedian. There's not much more to know, except for everything. Telea has a tendency to not think before she speaks or acts. She enjoys chocolate, long walks on the beach, and talking about herself in the third person. She wants to get to know you, so please send her your Name, Address, and SSN. Telea promises that, though she has indeed committed one count of Lewd and Lascivious behavior (to be tried under a court of law), she is a good person and will not intentionally harm you/expose herself to you/hate you for your stupid perspectives/axe-murder you. Telea believes in the greater good, Nutella, peace, free love for all, and snuggles. She chooses Bacon over you, unless you come bearing bacon. She is a fat woman trapped inside a curvy woman's body. She is not for sale unless the price tag you put on her has something to do with world peace. She will sell herself for world peace. She hopes in the deepest of her heart places that you will enjoy her blog and find reason to follow it. Telea thanks you.

3 responses »

  1. Hmmm I’d agree with those who’ve told you before… you’re wise! Annoyingly so for a 17 year old 🙂

    Don’t worry about not knowing what you want to do when you… graduate, go to college, go to Uni, start your first job, marry have kids, don’t marry have kids blah blah the list is endless. You’ll find your own way, but I would advise you re-read these posts from time to time, as there are some gems in here.

    This quote came to me when you wrote about being scared & plans etc. I don’t remember who said it but “life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans”. This is possibly my favourite quote, because it resonates so strongly with me. I don’t know why as life interrupted me, before I started making plans. Wait… can you hear that… yep violins 🙂

    All the best Telea

    Reply
    • I could write a blog:
      ‘The Annoyingly Wise Teenage Opinion.’
      It could be an advice column, updated weekly.
      But I’m not going to, because that sounds incredibly bland and overdone.
      I have a plan. It’s half-baked…or maybe just got stuck in the oven and pulled right back out, but it’s a plan, nonetheless.
      I just want to sing. That’s all I could ever dream of or hope for and it’s enough.
      Oh my goodness, my mother says that all the time.
      “Can you hear that? A thousand tiny violins just started playing for you.”
      What a fruit. xD

      Reply
      • Ah well in that case I’ll keep an eye for you on the X Factor…

        A fruit? Over this side of the pond that means gay? If this is indeed what you mean, please elaborate (although if you’re calling me an old woman no need to answer, I just figured. Er don’t tell your mum I called her old. I’m sure she’s mistaken for your older sister all the time, ahem)

        If not, what does it mean in your neck of the foliage?

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